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| Ben Elton
Even if it sounds pretentious, which it isn't-I've found it artistically challenging to produce a monologue that is filled with laughter and ideas. It's a tough thing to pull off, but satire is better if it has conviction behind it. For the past seventeen years I have been experimenting with lager. I am a lager user and one drug leads to another. If you do lager, as night follows day, you'll end up doing Kentucky Fried ChickenI don't know about the superhighways-it's a load of technowank, frankly. I owe my future married happiness to trade union legislation. In 1986, when Rik Mayall and I toured Australia, we had to have a support act of two Aussies for every one Brit, so they booked an all-girl band called The Jam Tarts, which she was in. I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it's a risk worth running. I'm easy to work with, not a pushover, but I respond to criticism and find it inspiring. I'm not writing the novels to be a preacher, but I obviously feel, as everybody doe,s strongly about environmental issues. But I'm not a zealot. I don't think we should all have to wear Hessian underwear and knit our yoghurt. If only the strength of the love that people feel when it is reciprocated could be as intense and obsessive as the love we feel when it is not; then marriages would be truly made in heaven.My advice to anyone adapting a novel is that once they've read it and learnt to understand it, then they must throw it away and never look at it again! No collection of people who are all waiting for the same thing are capable of holding a natural conversation. Even if the thing they are waiting for is only a taxi.People who get through life dependent on other people's possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.People worry way too much about the way food looks. I mean, what's it
going to look like after it's been through 28 feet of small intestine?Prevarication is the absolute essence of any endeavour, but it's not just writing novels, it could be the situation of paying a gas bill. People will basically do anything to avoid doing the thing that they're supposed to be doing. Sympathy for victims is always counter-balanced by an equal and opposite feeling of resentment towards them.The earth only has so much bounty to offer and inventing ever larger and more notional prices for that bounty does not change its real value.We've all got to look at ourselves, start with yourself, that's all you can do. I believe that we can act responsibly as a group, it's just that there are vested interests telling us not to bother. Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I'd never used it. I'm 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s. |
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