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| Bill Vaughan
A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and
rejoices that the system works.A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm. An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. I'm an actor. And I guess I've done so many movies I've achieved some high visibility. But a star? I guess I still think of myself as kind of a worker ant. If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity. In the game of life, it's a good idea to have a few early losses, which relieves you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season. In the next century it will be the early mechanical bird which get the first plastic worm out of the artificial grass.It would be nice if the poor were to get even half of the money that is spent in studying them.It's hard for the modern generation to understand Thoreau, who lived beside a pond but didn't own water skis or a snorkel. Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into interplanetary space, after having given up on the problem of an efficient way to get himself five miles to work and back each day.Muscles come and go; flab lasts.People learn something every day, and a lot of times it's that what they learned the day before was wrong. Pipe-smokers spend so much time cleaning, filling and fooling with their pipes, they don't have time to get into mischief.Retirement, we understand, is great if you are busy, rich and healthy.But
then, under those conditions, work is great too.Some idea of inflation comes from seeing a youngster get his first job at a salary you dreamed of as the culmination of your career.The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its prediction and then disappears.The tax collector must love poor people. He is creating so many of them.The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.To God, thy countrie, and thy friend be true.We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.When a fellow you knew in school attains some lofty
public office, you're glad for his sake --but somewhat
apprehensive for the future of the country.Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. |
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