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George Jean Nathan


  • A life spent in constant labor is a life wasted, save a man be such a fool as to regard a fulsome obituary notice as ample reward.

  • An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.

  • I know many married men, I even know a few happily married men, but I don't know one who wouldn't fall down the first open coal hole running after the first pretty girl who gave him a wink.

  • Love demands infinitely less than friendship.

  • Patriotism is a arbitrary veneration of real estate above principles.

  • The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth.

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